I don’t really do “new year’s resolutions.” But I guess you could say that mine this year is to learn to accept life’s happenings as ordained by the LORD. To realize that there’s a time for everything, the good things and the bad, and to not stress when hard times came.
Ha. That’s easy for me to say.
Our littlest Calf, just over two years old, has had various tests over the past few months to find out why she coughed so much last year. We ruled out cystic fibrosis and many other diseases, but found that her lungs had bled–recently and substantially. So then our question changed from “Why is she coughing?” to “Why was she bleeding?”
(Because lung bleeding, I’ve learned, is a reeeeeally serious thing and can damage my poor baby’s lungs or heart. Or cause, you know, a quick death, since you can’t live long if you can’t breathe and lungs filling with blood can seriously impede a child’s ability to breathe. :P )
We have not yet found an answer to this question. We got home Friday from yet another trip to the Big City where yet another expensive and serious test shows no solid answers. We have ruled out a lot of diseases and conditions–the less serious and easier to treat ones. Unfortunately, because this leaves the more serious and harder to treat ones.
After the test, the doctor gave us three possible courses of action: a lung biopsy, systemic steroids, or some other unknown treatment. He wanted to talk with yet another specialist before making his decision. We hope to hear this week.
Today I realize that I’m in over my head with this new mindset thingey. Time to call out the big dogs. I think I need to memorize a new Psalm.
I love Psalms, ya know? Chock full of the full range of human emotions, from highs to lows. And we’re kinda low right now.
Inspired by this song that we sang at church two weeks ago,
So when I’m anxious about my baby’s health or upcoming medical treatments or procedures, I’m going to be going over these verses.
Interestingly enough, I read a few weeks ago that this verse is often used as a traditional Jewish blessing for women in labor and for children. Cool, huh?
I feel better already. Truly.