Do you ever have times when what you are listening to the radio or walk into the mall and the music playing just hits you where you are hurting?
That’s happened for me this week, multiple times.
Monday, for instance. I dropped the children off at a vacation Bible school and came back a little early to pick them up. I was feeling really low that night. (Not enough sleep? not taking my vitamins? A full day of dreary drippy weather? I don’t know.)
But the VBS theme (PandaMania, if you are interested) and the songs they sang that night were soooo incredibly . . . . well, just what I needed.
“Wild About Us”
“God is wild about us!”
“Not Forgotten,” originally by Israel and New Breed
“I am not forgotten, I am not forgotten, I am not forgotten, God knows my name!”
“He Knows My Name,” originally by Tommy Walker
“I have a Father
He calls me His own
He’ll never leave me
No matter where I go
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and He hears me when I call”
Oh–and the memory verse that night–Psalm 139 : 14, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” A verse that I love and hate.
And then there was yesterday. Lately we’ve been listening to audio cd’s in the van while we go from place to place. (We’ve found some good ones, too, but that’s another story.)
The past few days, however, I’ve been listening to KLOVE. I like the music and it is usually encouraging.
The songs they have been playing this week are songs that were encouraging to me last year–when I was pregnant after having miscarried and miserable. But this year, the things that are standing out to me are slightly different.
Laura Story “Blessings”
“‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise”
Josh Wilson “Dark Before The Morning”
“Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming
So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
Its just the dark before the morning”
These lines helped me get through last summer. This time, though? These ones are hitting me:
“Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory”
Then, this morning, I was at a business and they were playing contemporary Christian music off iTunes. Five out of six songs just knocked my socks off. And they are all oldies (but goodies.)
Casting Crowns, “Praise You In This Storm”
“I will praise You in this storm and I will lift my hands
For you are who you are, no matter where I am”
One of my perennial favorite songs. Timely, literally, considering the rain this week.
Barlow Girl, “I Need You To Love Me”
“Why, why are You still here with me?
Didn’t You see what I’ve done? . . .
I don’t deserve You
But I need You to love me
And I, I won’t keep my heart from You this time
I’ll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have . . .
I, I have wasted so much time
Pushing You away from me
I just never saw how You
Could cherish me
But You’re a God who has all things
And still you want me?”
Especially after Monday’s depressed evening. . . hey, did that really say “cherish”?!?!
TobyMac, “Made To Love”
“I was made to love
And be loved by You”
I forget that part. This life isn’t as much about me loving Him as it is about Him loving me.
Stellar Kart, “Me and Jesus”
“Someone loves you even when you don’t think so
Don’t you know, you’ve got me and Jesus
By your side through the fight,
You will never be on your own,
You’ve got me and Jesus.”
Sanctus Real, “Don’t Give Up On Love”
“I heard you say you can’t change a stubborn heart
I can relate ’cause that’s how I feel when I talk with you”
I know that I tend to be a wee bit stubborn. . . I guess? It’s hard for me to believe these songs sometimes, but I know that they are all true. Do I need constant reminders? or do I need to give up this stubbornness once for all and just believe?
(This song is also a sad reminder for me of a good friend whose husband has abandoned her.)
What do you think? Am I nuts? Does this kind of thing ever happen to you, where song after song just hits you like this?