MM: February 15, 2010

holy experience

It’s been a bit of a difficult week, again!

Don’t I say that every week??

Last week was a difficult anniversary.

And a pregnant friend was dealing with several medical conditions, including preeclampsia, and possibly delivering her baby too early.  (He was born last week, but he is doing okay.)

And I was supposed to be pregnant right now, but for whatever reason I’m not.  (Well, the reason is that I miscarried back in October. I’m just not sure why that happened.)  But I guess that, right now, instead of gestating my son  I am gestating gratitude.

Honestly, most of what people say to try to comfort me have fallen short.  Their words don’t stop my heart from hurting.  I guess this meme is helping me to find little bits of comfort in these daily graces.

Think of it as my way to try to climb out of the pit.

Can I quote you, Heidi“If you can’t see beyond your own pain enough to find the good then you will forever be shrouded in dark, gloomy clouds.”

612~All three children:  “Is it time for school yet?”
613~”Please help the people in Haiti to get everything they need, even toothbrushes.”  Calf #2’s prayer during circle time
614~The question during Bible time: “What kind of work can Mama do for God?”  Calf #1:  “Take care of the kids!”  Calf #2: “Yeah, take care of us!” 🙂
615~”Dear God, thank You for this food and thank You that it’s Monday.”  Calf #1 at lunchtime
616~Calf #3, at bedtime, asking me: “Mama turn off window”
617~”You’re the funniest Mama I ever had,” Calf #1, after reading what I wrote for his copywork
618~Science projects with the boys
619~Calf #3 wanting to sit with me while we watch a movie, with snuggles and “I love you Mama”
620~The “crystal gardens”–beautiful, fragile
621~A windy, snowy, cloudy day means that all three children can put a sticker on the weather chart
622~Calf #1 wanting to finish the last four lessons of his reading book today! –although we couldn’t
623~Finishing The House at Pooh Corner, and realizing that I enjoy it much more than the boys do
624~Calf #3 willingly going down for her nap
625~Getting the “town day” planned out in advance
626~The Bull staying up later than he wanted to wait for me to join him
627~Getting to the gas station before running out of gas
628~Errands finished in a timely manner so we can get to the fun part of the day
629~Calf #3 shrieking with laughter, excitement, joy over decorating her artwork
630~Getting to the store by myself
631~Talking with a friend over dinner. . . sharing our difficulties together
632~Getting to another store by myself
633~Running into a friend at the store and sharing my heart with her
634~A stable report from my pregnant friend
635~Calf #3 singing her song, “The Baby Song”:  “Baby song, baby song, baby song, The end.”
636~Waking before The Bull leaves for work
637~A game of Go Fish where everyone gets a few matches and is happy with the animal they won
638~42 degrees? In Alaska, in February?  Wow!!
639~Keeping my focus on an emotionally difficult day
640~Neosporin + pain relief on the thumb I cut while getting apples for the children this morning
641~Rocking with Calf #3 while she sings to me
642~Beautifully detailed cross-stitched bookmark that a friend gave me for my last birthday in October (right after miscarrying)
643~My grandmother’s hand towel, white with purple design
644~A mug from my father’s last employer
645~My friend and her baby survived the delivery!
646~Getting the news that they are okay
647~The Bull home from work, even though he brought bad news
648~Calf #1 wanting to do his work
649~Calf #2 finishing his work, too
650~Moose meat, although I wish The Bull could have stayed home
651~And when he did get home he helped Calf #1 with his work
652~A bedtime talk with The Bull and tears that calmed my heart a bit
653~Calf #1 so confident with his work
654~The cookies that the boys and I made went over well, and there were even a few left over!
655~Both boys confident and knowledgeable, a testament to my teaching maybe?
656~Boys earning prizes in their contests!
657~Somebody’s Daddy (not ours) galloping with his small son on his shoulders at the store; in the midst of all the people and noise there is just a man and his boy
658~A simple dinner when I realized the meal planned wouldn’t work
659~My little girl’s little white socks with purple lacing and bows
660~A found treasure: audio taped “valentine’s cards” from a decade past
661~Two bits of sage advice about what to do after the bad moments have passed, a reminder of a favorite verse, and a lovely quote: “It’s not that you aren’t going to blow it, it’s what you do with it afterwards.”
662~Valentine’s chocolate candy
663~Simple treat bags for the children
664~A tasty turkey and turkey leftovers: my favorite!!
665~Naps for some of us, and quiet time for the others
666~Calf #3 putting on herself the slippers I’d made over ten years ago, before children or The Bull entered my life
667~An excellent report on my friend’s baby: off the ventilator!
668~My honey loves me  ♥
669~Calf #3 singing her songs for me to videotape

Does this sound like a good idea to you? Want to join us?

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