But I’m here briefly to share some news:

The Good

(Isn’t it odd that the vertical line is so much darker than the horizontal line? Interestingly, another good friend got a similar looking test right before I got this one.)

We are currently just over three months away from meeting the newest Calf. It’s kinda exciting.  Thankfully, this pregnancy has been much better than the last one. There was nausea, but it was easier to deal with–and nowhere near as long lasting. I’ve also not (yet) had the horrible SPD pain that was so debilitating and excruciating.

I’m hoping too, that this baby’s birth will be better than the last one *shudder.*

The Bad

I was about 6 or 8 weeks along when my dear sister found out that she was also expecting! It was exciting to think about us going through pregnancy together, though we live on different ends of of the country.

And then she started spotting, then bleeding. After a horrible Saturday in the ER she thought that all would be ok. But no; she found out on Monday night that her baby was gone. (My faith in the US maternity care system has been shaken much these past years.)

So now, my sis gets to go through a lot of the same things that I went through. And I, the one person who could support her most. . . have been dealing with my own pregnancy. Do I tell her when I feel the baby move? when I hear the baby’s heartbeat at prenatal visits? should I tell her when I’m in labor? After I lost my baby I wanted nothing to do with pregnant women or new babies–difficult as one of my best friends gave birth just two or three weeks after I lost my baby. I couldn’t even look at the poor kid for the longest time.

The Ugly

The ugly is my attitude.

Things have been so hard, for so long, that I don’t know that we can really have anything truly good in life. Oh, there are beautiful “gifts” here and there. . . golden sunsets, cute and touching things that the Calves say or do, understanding friends with comforting words. But the pains and sorrows and losses  of the past SEVEN YEARS!!! have been unending, like waves of the ocean ripping apart a stranded boat. We don’t have time to deal with, to grieve, one trouble or a loved one’s death before the next one happens. It’s just been too, too much for too long.

And it shows no sign of stopping. Even this summer, we’ve dealt with a major health issue that threatens to radically change life for our family, and not for the good.

How can I believe that this baby’s birth will be a blessing–and not yet another trauma for us to have to deal with?  How much more can we handle??  When will life calm down for us?  How do we survive when it’s been one tragedy after another?

There are so many painful, difficult situations that have happened to me in March in years past (or not happened. . .) and this year it was just too hard to ignore them.  So much for “moving on,” as people have suggested.  “Getting over it” doesn’t seem possible.  It doesn’t seem to work for me.

It would seem that grief needs expression, whether it be 27 years (my parents’ divorce) or 19 years (my first husband’s death) or 2 years (my due date with my miscarried baby) later.

A quote from a dear friend comforted my heart this month:

“Aren’t we amazing that we have the capacity to feel and hold things so strongly after what seems like a long time. I think it must have something to do with being eternal, with God’s time, and the incredible power of love and how ever fiber of our being conforms to our experiences. Pain doesn’t just go away and people who think it does are probably holding it somewhere else and don’t realize it.”

Next year I think I must be more proactive in doing “something” to soothe my hurting heart this month before it gets too bad.  I don’t think I have the time, energy, or resources to create a foundation or anything that grand.

But maybe a daily, focused gratitude would be in order.  Or a list of his favorite things.  Or a daily joke.  Perhaps a comforting song every day.

I don’t know what, but something must be different next year.  I don’t want to repeat this year, next year!!

Anyway I bought this book 17 months ago (for just one cent!! score!) but it’s just been sitting in my reading pile, waiting.  Although I enjoy reading, I just don’t often; its takes too much time.  And if I get sucked into a book I can’t stop till it is finished, and that gets in the way of my sleeping.

But I thought the time was right for this book.  It’s not long; I was able to read it all in one night.

Besides, I knew the basic story and I thought this might be helpful for me right now.

If you are familiar with my story,  you may remember that this time of year is especially difficult for me.  And every year I get to the beginning of February and I think that things are fine.  Then we get close to the second week of February and I remember that there is a certain date coming up and I try to brush it off. “Oh, it’s fine, it wont bother me this year.”

And then that date comes up and it smacks me upside the head like a bag of bricks.  It does bother me, every year.  I thought I was handling this well but maybe I’m not, even now, nineteen years later.

So I thought I might be able to read this book last night. Who knows, maybe I just needed a good cry.  And while I did enjoy the story, it’s the perspective in it that I needed more than anything.

The basic story is that the author’s wife unexpectedly died and later he remarries. It’s a common storyline and I’m sure that many people have a similar story.  It’s my story too.

What’s unusual is the ways that  the LORD comforted him during these hard times in their lives–throughout the cancer and financial worries and even losing his beloved wife.

About halfway through the book I knew I’d hit on something good, something I needed to remember.  So I grabbed my highlighter marker, the one I’d gotten from my late father-in-law, yellow with a door in the base that twists to open a compartment with skinny post-it flags.  I flagged four passages while reading last night and putting the baby to sleep.

And because I know I’m not the only one dealing with pain, disappointments, sorrows, etc., I thought I’d share them.

page 73: “Suddenly, I saw suffering as God’s way of removing life’s nonessentials in order to reveal what is true and lasting.”

No joke!  After losing my loved ones, I hold those remaining a little more tightly and try to cherish the time we are given even more.  I can ignore the sticky table and piled up laundry and junk covering the floor–if only for a few moments.  These can be attended to later. My children, my husband, my siblings, close friends and family . . . I know they won’t be here forever.

page 91: “Late one night when I was putting Jack to bed, it occurred to me that the times of greatest growth in my life always had been times of intense difficulty and suffering.  As I looked down at Jack’s tiny form in the moonlight, it pained me to think that he too would suffer someday. I wanted to hold him, shield him from the evil in the world and protect him from any harm. Those thoughts quickly evaporated as God reminded me in my spirit that He loved this child even more than I did.

“I wanted a godly son. And if what the Bible says is true, fire brings refined gold. I stayed up that evening, meditating on the relationship between those two truths . . .”

He goes on to tell of writing a song for his baby boy, a song about finding the LORD in brokenness, learning to stand and rise above the difficult circumstances in life.

Honestly, I struggle with this. I know so many people who are hurting, truly and terribly hurting right now.  I wish I could make things easier for my loved ones.  I wish life were not so difficult for them.  I know they will be better people for what they go through, but I wish this would happen without the painful parts!

page 132-33: Isaiah 58:6-12: “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?  Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter–when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?  Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.  Then you will call, and the LORD will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. ‘If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.  The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.  Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.’ “

I know this isn’t very deep (I would love to study this passage in greater depth but can’t spend the time right now!) but I’ve heard it said that some people help others because it makes them feel better.  Maybe this is part of this healing that is talked about here–part of God’s plan?

page 134, “As during Cydi’s cancer treatment years, pain again had stripped away the pretense in my life. I only wanted what was real and lasting: God. When I was weary and in pain, the only thing that brought me comfort was thoughts of Jesus and His mercy.”

When everything around me is falling apart, the things that I hold to closer are things of the LORD.  I’ve found comfort in knowing that the LORD loves me, that He will make things OK in the end.  That He is close to the brokenhearted.

Although sometimes my cynicism gets the best of me.  I know I’m not alone.  A song I found when pregnant with my littlest spoke so clearly about that for me. I’ll end with this tonight. I think it’s a beautiful way to bridge the gap between the tragedy and pain . . . and the hope and healing:

Hard to Get--by Rich Mullins
You who live in heaven
Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
Who are afraid of being left by those we love
And who get hardened by the hurt
Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape
To find the faith to ask for daily bread
Did You forget about us after You had flown away
Well I memorized every word You said
Still I'm so scared, I'm holding my breath
While You're up there just playing hard to get
You who live in radiance
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in skin
We have a love that's not as patient as Yours was
Still we do love now and then
Did You ever know loneliness
Did You ever know need
Do You remember just how long a night can get?
When You were barely holding on
And Your friends fall asleep
And don't see the blood that's running in Your sweat
Will those who mourn be left uncomforted
While You're up there just playing hard to get?
And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained
And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know
Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can't see what's ahead
And we can not get free of what we've left behind
I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here
Where I'm lost enough to let myself be led
And so You've been here all along I guess
It's just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get

OK, sorry, not really.  This year, once again, I watched for the commercials.

And the food.

And hanging out with my friends.

(No crocheting this time, I was kinda busy.)

And the little people that joined us last time?  They are bigger now. (I really need to update the blog. . .)  And they had their friends too.

And afterwards The Bull and I had to rent a certain video. . . I don’t think I’d ever seen a certain movie in its entirety.  Well. . . . I can’t say that anymore.

And ya know what? It is fun to think of ditching reality/ real life for a day and living it up.

Let’s do that sometime, ok friend? 

Tonight we were doing our advent devotional (we are only a few days behind. . .) and I don’t know what version this is.  (But I’m too lazy to look it up, sorry.)

Zechariah:  “How can I know this will happen? I’m an old man now, and my wife is also well along in years.”  And then, of course, he said nothing else.  He couldn’t. (Luke 1.18)

Mary: “But how can I have a baby? I am a virgin.”  And then Gabriel explains what will happen, and then she says: “I am the Lord’s servant, and I am willing to accept whatever he wants. May everything you have said come true.” (Luke 1.34 and 38)

W-O-W!!!

Zechariah’s response, paraphrased: “How can I know. . . “  Well, duh, if an angel came with a message from God, you can know God will do it. He’s like that, He keeps his promises.

Mary’s response, paraphrased: “How will it work?”  She’s asking to know what will happen, more details.  She believes it will happen but wants to know how she’ll know it’s about to come about.

And then, of course, after she gets these details, her reaction is “Sure. Let’s do it.”  Paraphrased, of course. 

I’ve heard sermons for years about how she gave up her life dreams, hopes, plans for this big unknown of conceiving this Child.  At the very least, she would have understood that the attached strings had huge stigma.  Never before did I understand the hugeness of what she did.  Maybe she was looking forward to marrying her sweetheart, settling down into keeping house and raising a pile of children, first-century Nazareth style.  Being found to be pregnant before her wedding hijacked all of that.

And I keep wondering, would she have taken the trip to Bethlehem with Joseph had she not been pregnant?  She wouldn’t have needed to. She could have waited in her parents’ house for him to return to Nazareth from his trip.  When she was found to be pregnant, Joseph took her into his home early.  Who would have taken care of her while he was gone?  And by “taken care of,” I mean help her, fix the dishwasher when it breaks, haul the wet laundry to the clothesline, bring over dinner Friday night–not stone her.

Anyway, I personally don’t like to travel when pregnant, and that’s with a comfy van to drive and soft bed and easy-to-prepare food at each stop.  I hear that road conditions and accommodations in her travel route would have been much more, ah, rustic.

And even when the Bethlehem trip could have been over, they stayed there. Traveling pregnant would not have been fun. Traveling with a newborn or a one-year-old would not have been fun either.  And what would she be going home to- – a town where her reputation was somewhat tarnished?  Who would have accepted the Baby, knowing what they thought they knew about His parents?  Surely it was better for everyone involved that they stay away for a few years.

I wonder what her parents and siblings thought.  Being so far away from her home town, she effectively lost her family in a day before Facebook or email or even the U. S. Postal Service.  That’s if they would have accepted her or wanted to associate with her.

Of course, there is no way that she could have known all that would have happened in the future, all the stops that would have been different in her life because of the switch in the tracks.  And yet, Mary’s response reminds me of what Ann says: “All is grace!”  I am overwhelmed.  I don’t know that I could have said the same.

I haven’t said the same.

A flat tire?  I throw a fit.  A sick child rearranging my schedule?  I grumble and groan and get frustrated.  An unexpected move? I balk.

An unexpected end to a pregnancy?  Ouch.  My first reaction is, usually, to try to fight for what I want. (Like that would help?!)

While we were doing this devotional, my oldest asked me to spell out a particular verse. (verse 37, “For nothing is impossible with God.”)  I told him to look on the previous page of the devotional and he refused.  A moment before when we asked what he would do if God told him to do something other than what he wanted to do he said, of course, he would do what God wanted.  But he won’t even do what I tell him to do.

And I am the same way.  How can I help him to accept it all as grace, if I cannot?

I hope that I can remember this at the next fork in the road.  We all need it.

About The Location
59 = average high temperature (in Paxson, the closest town to our campsite)
42 = average low temperature (again, in Paxson)
4.5 = days with rain
1 = day without rain (the last one, of course, when we drove home)
1 = days of dry brush while The Bull was hunting (the first. . . it was dry when we arrived and dry when we left. . . apparently we hit a patch of rain!  Thankfully he had hip boots to keep himself dry on those wet days)
20 = percent of time there was rain during those days
1 = days our pop-up tent leaked
0 = amount of dust (but see previous item of days of rain, which yielded . . . . )
countless = amount of mud
1 = number of Iditarod mushers met on the trip

About The Hunting Party
4 = adults on the trip
6 = children on the trip
1 = baby
8 = bicycles taken out there
1 = horse on the trip
4 = tooth brushes purchased for people who had forgotten theirs (oops!!)
1 = number of times that the baby fell out of the trailer (thankfully, she did not hit the trailer tongue on the way down!!)
lots = number of diapers changed
1 = back ache for me (which is amazing, because normally it’s every day; guess I need a firmer mattress?)
7 = sets of clothing taken for each Moose child
3 = sets of clothes they went through on the first day camping (refer back to previous number of rainy days. . . . and temperature . . . )
10 = loads of laundry it took to clean up when we got home
3 = boxes of Kleenex brought with us
1 = Moose children who were sick when we left for camp
3 = Moose children who were sick when we left for home

What We Did There
just over 900 = miles driven from Anchorage, round trip
$4.85 = most expensive diesel fuel, per gallon, on our trip (Meiers Lake)
$6 = What I paid for one shower at a lodge near our campsite (a tiny shower stall in a cold shower house, mildewy, run by a generator, and very little water pressure. . . best shower I had the whole trip!) ( . . . OK, the only shower I had the whole trip! But still!)
$6 = What we paid for two showers in Glennallen (modern and clean, and neither for me)
11 = Narnia CDs listened to while driving out there and back
almost 5 = inches of the baby’s afghan I knitted while The Bull drove many of those 900 miles
about 20 = blueberries picked by Calf #2 on “Blueberry Hill,” his favorite spot near our campsite
40 or 50 = number of times the Calves and their friends hiked up to Blueberry Hill or down to the swamp
4 = days the Mooselets got to ride bikes around the camp
8 = chapters read in my book

About The Food
40 = pounds of dry ice purchased
$96 = cost of that dry ice (ouch!!!)
4 = days the dry ice kept things frozen
24 = ice cream treats that were purchased (intended to be eaten on our trip with our friends)
24 = ice cream treats that melted (it just never got warm enough to eat ice cream)
about 14 = pounds of fresh fruits and vegetables purchased (bananas, pears, oranges, lettuce, carrots)
17 = different meal items brought (macaroni and cheese, spam, canned soup, beanie weenie, tortilla chips with cheese dip and refried beans, pouches of ready-to-eat curried potatoes, granola bars, peanut butter and jelly, sliced turkey and cheese for sandwiches, cup o’noodles, instant oatmeal, dehydrated potatoes and cheese powder, canned fruit, canned juice, hot cocoa, coffee, milk)
4 = different meal items that we didn’t eat on our trip (we took waaaaaay more food out than we could have possibly eaten!)
8 = cans of spam taken out
2 = cans of spam eaten
11 = meals eaten in the wilderness
5 = meals eaten with our camping friends
5 = loaves of bread taken with us
3 = meals of sandwiches
9 = types of snacks brought (cracker/cheese packets, cookie packets, homemade cookies, gummi bears, jerky, smoked almonds, black licorice, dried fruit, corn chips)
36 = ounces of jerky taken
2 = gallon sized bucket of cookies taken

The End Results
1 = caribou that came home with us! Praise the LORD!!
468 = photos taken
Will try to post some of them next time. . . . . . . . .

We are headed out again. . . . . . . same bat-location, different bat-time. Earlier this time.

But this time with a baby. (Yes, I am crazy, why do you ask?) And friends.

Catch you on the flip-side.

That’s happened for me this week, multiple times.

Monday, for instance. I dropped the children off at a vacation Bible school and came back a little early to pick them up.  I was feeling really low that night.  (Not enough sleep? not taking my vitamins? A full day of dreary drippy weather? I don’t know.)

But the VBS theme (PandaMania, if you are interested) and the songs they sang that night were soooo incredibly . . . . well, just what I needed.

“Wild About Us”

“God is wild about us!”

“Not Forgotten,” originally by Israel and New Breed

“I am not forgotten, I am not forgotten, I am not forgotten, God knows my name!”

“He Knows My Name,” originally by Tommy Walker

“I have a Father
He calls me His own
He’ll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and He hears me when I call”

Oh–and the memory verse that night–Psalm 139 : 14, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”  A verse that I love and hate.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

And then there was yesterday.  Lately we’ve been listening to audio cd’s in the van while we go from place to place.  (We’ve found some good ones, too, but that’s another story.)

The past few days, however, I’ve been listening to KLOVE. I like the music and it is usually encouraging.

The songs they have been playing this week are songs that were encouraging to me last year–when I was pregnant after having miscarried and miserable.  But this year, the things that are standing out to me are slightly different.

Yesterday’s songs:

Laura Story “Blessings”

“‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise”

Josh Wilson “Dark Before The Morning”

“Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming
So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
Its just the dark before the morning”

These lines helped me get through last summer.  This time, though?  These ones are hitting me:

“Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Then, this morning, I was at a business and they were playing contemporary Christian music off iTunes.  Five out of six songs just knocked my socks off.  And they are all oldies (but goodies.)

Casting Crowns, “Praise You In This Storm”

“I will praise You in this storm and I will lift my hands
For you are who you are, no matter where I am”

One of my perennial favorite songs. Timely, literally, considering the rain this week.

Barlow Girl, “I Need You To Love Me”

“Why, why are You still here with me?
Didn’t You see what I’ve done? . . .
I don’t deserve You
But I need You to love me
And I, I won’t keep my heart from You this time
I’ll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have . . .
I, I have wasted so much time
Pushing You away from me
I just never saw how You
Could cherish me
But You’re a God who has all things
And still you want me?”

Especially after Monday’s depressed evening. . . hey, did that really say “cherish”?!?!

TobyMac, “Made To Love”

“I was made to love
And be loved by You”

I forget that part. This life isn’t as much about me loving Him as it is about Him loving me.

Stellar Kart, “Me and Jesus”

“Someone loves you even when you don’t think so
Don’t you know, you’ve got me and Jesus
By your side through the fight,
You will never be on your own,
You’ve got me and Jesus.”

Sanctus Real, “Don’t Give Up On Love”

“I heard you say you can’t change a stubborn heart
I can relate ’cause that’s how I feel when I talk with you”

I know that I tend to be a wee bit stubborn. . . I guess?  It’s hard for me to believe these songs sometimes, but I know that they are all true.  Do I need constant reminders? or do I need to give up this stubbornness once for all and just believe?

(This song is also a sad reminder for me of a good friend whose husband has abandoned her.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

What do you think? Am I nuts?  Does this kind of thing ever happen to you, where song after song just hits you like this?

The Four Young Adults were arrested 22 June. One young man appears to be a career criminal with a rap sheet as long as my arm.  Two others have a pretty good start on their life of crime: a young man and a young lady.  (To be honest, she has been a defendant in several of her cases.)  The fourth is a young lady who seemed to have a promising future; a Google search shows awards and honor roll listings and no prior offenses.  Both young ladies had young daughters.  The Bull attended their arraignment.  One of the young ladies was crying, wondering who would take care of her daughter.

Most posted bail and were out of jail within a week or two.  We were still not sure why they picked our house to rob and burglarize, or if they would return.  The stolen and recovered items would be returned to us; we hoped soon.  But the broken and missing things we only had hopes of getting money back.

Needless to say, this added to my already high anxiety level with being pregnant with unusual symptoms after miscarrying.  How do you tell the kids that no, someone wouldn’t be interested in stealing their toys when thieves broke in and carried off board games?!

You would think that this would be a quick ordeal as the persons were caught red handed.  Oh No Not At All.  The Grand Jury trial was within the month, but their court dates were pushed back again and again, month after month.

In October we spent substantial time trying to place values on our belongings.  How do you estimate the value of something purchased brand new for a small fortune in 1970, a family treasure, that now can only be purchased used for about a hundred bucks?  How do you value a hand made, one of a kind item made by someone now deceased?  Items that you weren’t even sure how many you had?  The restitution is only allowed to be actual purchase price as proven by receipts or actual replacement value.

All Four Young Adults finally made Plea Agreements in January/ February of this year.  You would think that this would end the ordeal.  Oh No Not At All.  We still had to wait to be allowed to claim our stolen property.  (We finally got our items back on 9 June 2011.)

Then there is the matter of restitution for the items that were damaged or disposed of (including The Bull’s father’s camera.)  Part of the Plea Agreements was that we would receive from these Four Young Adults money to replace these items.  If nothing else, we figured we would get our due in October 2011 when their Alaska Permanent Fund Dividends would be garnished.

The matter is concluded, right?  Oh No Not At All.  Last Friday we were informed that one of these Four Young Adults (Mr. Career Criminal) is contesting the restitution.  The Bull needs to rearrange his work schedule to take substantial time off to make a 3 hour drive, one way, to take to the court paperwork that they have already been given and testify.

Where is the justice?????  We have been wronged and yet the courts allow these criminals to continue to delay justice.  I am SO frustrated right now I want to scream!!

Alternately titled, “Why My House is a Constant Mess.”

Step 1, gather supplies.  Window cleaner, swifter duster thingey, paper towels.

Step 2, move back the curtains.

Step 3, pick up curtains off the floor since the rod on which they were hanging was almost out of the loops and you didn’t notice until the rod fell off.

Step 4, decide to fix the curtain later.

Step 5, figure that the other curtain will be easier to just hang back up when you are done since it’s fallen out of the loops too.  Pull it down and set it aside with the other one.

Step 6, man this is thirsty work!  Grab a swig of water quickly and get back to it.

Step 7, extend the blinds the full length in preparation for cleaning them.

Step 8, take the swifter duster thingey and swab in between the slats of the blinds.

Step 9, lift the four year old over the baby gate so he can go wash his hands.

Step 10, change the swifter duster thingey pad and swab a few more slats.

Step 11, grab another swig of water, since you have to take a break anyway.

Step 12, finish swabbing the blinds, change to a fresh pad, and put the duster thingey away.

Step 13, lift the four year old back over the baby gate so he can color.

Step 14, answer the phone and tell hubby what to pick up for dinner.

Step 15, give the baby her sippy cup so she’ll stop fussing.

Step 16, spray the window with window cleaner.

Step 17,wash the finger prints and sticky stuff and dead bugs off the window.

Step 18, suggest to the six year old that he not jump off the couch onto his sister.

Step 19, wipe the dead bugs out of the window track.

Step 20, look at watch and panic because it’s dinner time!  Quickly hang up the curtains again and put away the supplies.

Step 21, eat dinner.

Step 22, start a blog post about the process so your friends can laugh and show solidarity.

Step 23, put it aside to wash dishes and get kids to bed.

Step 24,  realize it’s been two years since you started washing the window but never finished.  The “six year old” is now almost nine.  The “four year old” is now six years old.  The “baby” is nearly four.  There is a new baby who wants to be held.

Step 25, hire a neighbor’s teenage daughter to wash the windows.

Total elapsed time:  2 years, 1 month, 5 days, 41 minutes 28 seconds.

*sigh*

Repeat for the other 5 windows in the house.